I should have called this post "living life despite cancer". Saw this in today's news, and got pretty hot about it (but I think that is the mission of the Daily Mail - excitable tabloid journalism):
"inspiring or irresponsible? Melanie has terminal cancer yet determined to start a family she chose to get pregnant"
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2034881/Inspiring-irresponsible-Melanie-terminal-cancer-determined-start-family-chose-pregnant.html?ito=feeds-newsxml
Melanie's and her husband's story has been linked to before in the Cheeky Librarian:
http://cheekylibrarian.blogspot.com/2011/07/adenoid-cystic-carcinoma-in-news_19.html
(and I am still asking you, my readers, if she is the first woman with ACC to be pregnant - I don't think so, but let me know.)
Quote from the Daily Mail's story: "How long will Melanie have with her children? Will Charlie become a widowed single parent?" And further down, "[...] Melanie and Charlie planned this pregnancy fully aware that Melanie's life expectancy could be as little as ten or 15 years."
Eyeballs are rolling here. With logic such as that produced in the article, no one should have babies, as none of us know if we would become widowed single parents (people are struck down with much more than cancer, really - motorized vehicles and slips in the shower, for example). My husband and I had 2 children while he was in the Army - what were we thinking??! Being a responsible parent means that you plan for the unexpected (life insurance, adequate education for both parents, family/friends support). The author of this article might as well write about how shocking it was that ANYONE had children back in the 1850's, since life expectancy was about 60 for 20-year-olds (according to DHHS figures on this table on infoplease http://www.infoplease.com/ipa/A0005140.html). No one knows what the future holds, and buddy, without someone having kids, there isn't much future. If I followed this author's logic, I wouldn't have moved or done anything since my initial diagnosis 5 years ago. Why start projects? Why invest in my retirement? Why repair my house? I will tell you why - because one keeps on living, with/despite/and past the cancer, until one doesn't live anymore.
If you or someone you know/love has been diagnosed with cancer, please don't let it define you. Yes, you won't be able to get life insurance (if you can, please let me know!), but other things and opportunities are wide open for you. Even (gasp!) creating a family. Go for it.
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3 comments:
Right on, Teri! One of the tenets I strive to adhere to is from Seneca: "As long as you live, keep learning how to live." Let's keep on truckin!
i believe there are a few moms on the forum who had their ACC return while pregnant. meaning in remission, but had the cancer return during pregnancy so had to get medical attention while pregnant.
i believe there are a few moms on the forum who had their ACC return while pregnant. meaning they were in remission but had the cancer return during pregnancy. not sure if there's anyone who got pregnant knowing they had mets though.
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