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Saturday, April 09, 2011

Lessons about adenoid cystic carcinoma from poker?

I am somewhat of a night owl now - waking up at various times in the night, and either making jewelry or watching late night tv (or both). I was flipping through channels one time, and one of the live poker championship shows was on. I heard the announcer say, as he was introducing the players: "no matter if you follow the rules, you can still lose this game." While I don't agree with 'fighting' cancer as a win/lose proposition, that statement could apply to those of us that are ACC-wearers. We can follow the rules set out in treatment protocols, or by the National Cancer Institute on their recommendations for healthy living, or by our primary care providers, yet still have the ACC come back. There is currently no way of us knowing our future path after that initial tumor-ectomy and/or ACC diagnosis. I may be doing more belly-button contemplation these days, since I am coming up to the artificial 5 year magic mark since the tumor was removed and diagnosed. Not sure. What I do know: I want to stress to anyone that thought they were rid of the ACC only to have it rear up again - don't blame yourself. As far as they (the researchers) know, we weren't to be blamed for having it the first time, and sure as heck aren't to be blamed for it coming back. I doubt I will be having a cake to mark my 5th year milestone (cake is nasty now anyway), but I will probably spend some additional quiet belly-button contemplation time, figuring out my part in this big-ol'-world and where I would like things to go if the game continues to play out in my favor. As for my fellow ACC-wearers - I wish for all of us days full of whatever makes us our best selves. Here's to many more years of game-playing for us all.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Hello Cheeky,

I get the no cake anniversary thing. June 14th is a very wierd day for me. All I seem to hear on that day is, "Tick Tock, Tick Tock." My husband has learned to give me a wide berth on this day

I am not afraid of death. But, liver, lung, brain or bone cancer, none of these sound like much fun to me.

My childrens' ages always come to my mind. How old will they be in five years? Then the far fetched ten?

At what point are we (ACCers) safe? What is the Magic Year Mark?
Is there even such a mark?

For everything ACC has taken away from me I have taken things for myself. One is I don't give much care to what others think about me. At least the others which haven't taken any time to get to know me.

I just don't give a flipping "BEEP" to what they think. This alone is worth the price of admission.

Joy, humor, fun and happiness are mine to find where ever I want. My life is mine. I share it with the ones I love and don't worry too much about the others.

I fight with my husband when he upsets me and I love on him when I want. And I truely appreciate every day I get to look in to the beautiful faces of my boys.

Also, I realize no one knows when their last day will be. However, I am lucky not to be fooled into not enjoying today.


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